dating (independiente)

in the U.S., we value our independence. not only as individuals, but also part of a couple. in fact, we view couples who spend ALOT time together as co-dependent and weird. it’s totally the opposite in Latin America. if you don’t spend every waking minute with that person or thinking about that person, you clearly do not view this person as a potential mate.

the thing is... i need alot of alone time. not only am i a gringo, but i-m an introverted gringo, which means i need shit ton of time alone, more so than the average american and for latinos it can seem like i don-t like the other person. it really has nothing to do with not wanting to be with the other person. it-s a basic function of my operating system.

and when you are not with the other person, they want to know EVERYTHING you did i your time part. how did you sleep - how many hours, did you dream, do you feel rested, will you need a nap later? did you have a good morning - were you busy, what did you accomplish, was your boss in the office? how many times did you go to the bathroom yesterday?

ok, I made that last one up, but I am expecting it any day now. seriously, they want to know EVERYTHING. for gringos, it’s quite tedious. we do not want or need this level of detail from ANYONE, especially not early in a relationship, but it’s a vital part of bonding here.

i can totally see how it would be a good thing to be so nosy. you can learn a lot just by asking simple questions instead of waiting until there are problems to ask questions. that being said, it’s not my culture so when someone is asking me soooo many questions, it doesn’t feel like a relationship so much as a doctor’s visit.